23rd December 2019
„The time we take is the time that gives us something.”
The end of the year, December; it should be a quiet time, a time to pause, a time for contemplation, self-reflection, friends and family. A time to slow down, to relax and celebrate. The time for our soul to rest and recuperate. A time to gain strength for what is to come.
Yet, every year during the festive season, I cannot help asking myself whether there is a busier time of the year? It seems to me, as if many of us are more stressed than ever. There is so much to do, at work, and also at home, and generally with the preparations for the holidays. So much to think about, so much to organize, so much to buy for the holidays, many of us are short of time at Christmastime. No need to think about giving our precious time away.
In my opinion, the festive season is a time for fairy tales; so, let me tell you a little story:
One day a father comes home after a long day of work. So many things have gone awry this day, he is so tired, his back is aching, his feet are hurting and he just wants to put his feet up and rest. As he takes his shoes off his eight-year-old son approaches him wondering whether the father could spare five minutes of his time. The father would rather take a shower and eat but he asks his son what it is about, anyway. The son shuffles with his feet, looks down and hesitates. The father has no patience for this today, hence he demands his son to speak up. The son summons all his courage and queries his father how much he earns an hour. The father is quite irritated about such an impertinent question but still answers to his son, telling him that he earns 20 Dollars an hour. Sheepishly the boy asks his father if he could borrow 10 Dollars from him. This query makes the father rather mad at his son; 10 Dollars are a lot of money to him and whatever for would his eight-year-old son need 10 Dollars? He cannot endure such nonsense and sends the boy to his room.
After only a few minutes, the father feels sorry about the dispute and his impatience towards his little son. He goes to the boy’s room and gives him the 10 Dollars. The boy takes the money, looks for his wallet and takes another 10 Dollars from his wallet, too. Now, the father gets angry. He has to work hard for his money, the son obvious has money already, and anyway he does not understand what an eight-year-old boy needs 20 Dollars for; and he starts yelling at his son. The boy starts crying. Seeing his son sitting on his bed sobbing inconsolable the father feels sorry again. He goes and sits next to his son, taking his hand and looking him into the eyes, he asks him what he needs the money for. His son snuffles, wipes his eyes with his hand and explains that he wanted to buy an hour of his time because his father is always only working and hardly has any time for his son.
Stop running around, take a deep breath and a few seconds to think about what it is that you would love doing with your time at hand. Who do you want to spend time with? Would you love to go for a walk alone through the forest? Do you want to meet your best friend for coffee? Wouldn`t it just be lovely to sit with a good book and a cup of tea, or mulled wine J?
Christmas time, the time for love – the love for yourself and other people in your life. How can you show your love for yourself and others better than giving your time away? Give some of your time to yourself and to your loved ones.
We all have 24 hours in our day, what we use it for is entirely up to us. How much time do you spend watching TV every day, playing games on your computer, scrubbing your already clean flat, trying to make everything perfect – while perfect does not exist – an endless undertaking.
Spend some quality time with your loved ones; and spend some time with yourself – some me-time. Take time for what and who you love – and love yourself a little more. It is important to take every day some time for yourself. Spent every day one hour alone, every week one day, and if possible at least every three month a weekend. This will give you time to relax, contemplate, for some self-reflection, to get your head clear, gain clarity; and get to know yourself better. You will become less stressed, and even increase your stress-resilience, become more balanced and love yourself more.
Whatever you do, wherever you are, I wish you a wonderful festive season.
Take care and be well.
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sibylle chaudhuri | coaching & training
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© sibylle chaudhuri | coaching & training