sibylle chaudhuri | coaching & training


Systemic and NLP Coach


Newsletter - September 2010


Feel your emotions


"One's suffering disappears when one lets oneself go, when one yields - even to sadness."

Antoine de Saint-Exupéry


Pretending our emotions are not real does not make them go away. When we ignore, fight, suppress or try to eliminate our emotions we just make them stronger and they can let us suffer endlessly, what we resist persists. We can become tense, agitated, nervous, stressed and even sick. Our life gets out of balance and sooner or later we will become aware of the price we pay for "being cool", putting up poker faces or covering up with "shiny happy", building walls around us and cutting ourselves off from our feelings. Emotional outbursts, less patience and more aggression towards our fellow men are nasty but harmless compared to diseases like cancer, diabetes, coronary heart diseases and many more caused by suppressed emotions.


Finding the strength to accept our emotional feelings is nothing else but acknowledging what is. Once we have the courage to face our emotions we can find out what we want to do with them.


"Feelings are much like waves, we can't stop them from coming but we can choose which one to surf."

Jonatan Mårtensson


Unfortunately most of us are so used to ignore or suppress our emotions that we have difficulties identifying them.

Take a few deep breaths and ask yourself: "How do I feel right now?"


2. Notice what feelings and emotions arise.


You might come up with answers like ‘strange', ‘okay', ‘good', ‘down', ‘frustrated', etc. Please note, these are neither emotional nor physical feelings. They are mental constructs we make up in our mind after perceiving an external event and relating our feelings to our inner map of the world and external circumstances.


Emotions are specific reactions to a certain event e.g. ‘love', ‘joy', ‘trust', ‘anger', ‘fear', ‘hate', ‘grief', etc.


3. So, stay focused inwards and ask yourself again: "What is it that I am feeling at the moment?" "How do I feel right now?" Tune in to your body and notice what you feel. Scan your body from head to toe and realise what you are feeling, do not go into your head and try to find the answer and do not judge or label your feelings. Just feel whatever it is you are feeling.


Try to do this exercise as often as you can during the day - at least three times.


Very often when we actually feel our emotions and allow them to be real, when we accept and acknowledge them, we already feel better and we can decide to do something about them or just let go. We will be able to move on, to change, and to grow. We will feel more alive and healthy, we will be more creative and productive and we can live every moment of our life consciously and enjoy it because we will be able to live in the present, right now. We regain our inner balance and can find more happiness in our lives.


Have fun, enjoy the moments in your life and be well.


Check out the quotation for September and the short excursion to it on my website.


Please feel free to forward this e-mail to family, friends and colleagues. This is a monthly newsletter.


Until next month I wish you all the best,


Sibylle Chaudhuri


sibylle Chaudhuri
coaching & training


Systemic and NLP Coach

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Everything provided in this newsletter is for informational and/or educational purposes only. It is supposed to make you think. What you do and what not is your decision only.


The given content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical, psychological and/or legal advice, diagnosis, treatment or consulting. Please consult your physician, therapist, lawyer regarding the applicability of any opinions or recommendations with respect to your concerns, symptoms and/or medical condition.


The content is allowed to use for private purpose only. Please do not copy and or use it for business purposes and/or publishing.

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sibylle chaudhuri

inner works for you
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Ratingen / Duesseldorf

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