Be your Valentine – self-love

Sibylle Chaudhuri

13th February 2023


Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay
Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

On Valentines’ Day the media bombards us with cheese commercials, movies, posts, blogs and tips about love and how to best celebrate Valentine’s Day. The focus – quite superficial – being on couples in love, flowers, chocolates, Teddy Bears, candlelight dinner. Tough luck when you are 


Whether you are single or celebrate Valentine’s Day away from your partner, chances of falling into the comparison trap on social media are huge. Understandably, it can cause a mix of feelings within us, and before long we start looking outward for acceptance and love.


Are you open for the possibility to look inward and to start loving yourself a little bit more?


Have yourself a happy Valentine’s Day with the person who deserves your love more than anyone else – YOU. The longest relationship you are ever going to have with someone is with yourself, so why not make it a good one.


What is self-love?

Self-love does not mean being selfish or narcissistic.


Self-love means accepting and respecting yourself, it is taking care of your own needs, your well-being. Self-love is knowing about and believing in your self-worth, your value as a human being. It is about remembering that you are already complete the way you are. You are the cake; any other relationship is complementary, it’s the coffee, tea or hot chocolate that comes with the cake.


Self-love is best Valentine’s gift you can give to yourself. It will improve your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Self-love is one of the main ingredients to become your best self. Loving yourself allows you to use your full potential and will make your relationships flourish in all parts of your life. The result in more happiness and success.


Use Valentine’s Day to love yourself a little bit more

Show yourself some of the love, compassion, and empathy you usually give others. Treat yourself like your best friend.


Social Media detox

As already mentioned above social media will most certainly be full of couples’ photos and endless love gestures from influencers which can trigger a myriad of emotions including anxiety and send you down a mental rabbit hole that’s hard to climb out of.


Leave your tablet, mobile phone, laptop in another room, best switched of and find positive ways to spend quality time with yourself.


Be present with and listen to yourself

Being in the here and now is always helpful in establishing and nourishing relationships. As it is important to listen to others it is equally important to listen to yourself. Take a deep breath and listen inwards. What thoughts, emotions and feelings are coming up? Acknowledge what it is, try not to judge or label it, and let it be there. Whatever it might be right now, in this moment, it is okay. 


In case there are emotions like sadness, frustration, anxiety coming up, ask yourself what need isn’t met to balance your emotional account. Make sure you drink enough water, eat a healthy diet, get enough good-night sleep, set boundaries, limit screen time, connect with like-minded people, etc. To take good care of yourself and to have your own back is an important part of self-love. And, of course, on Valentine’s Day, go and …


… pamper yourself

Buy yourself a nice bouquet of flowers and some yummy chocolate. 

Run yourself a hot bath, light some candles and soak and relax as long as you want with soothing music and a book.


Order your favourite take-away food and indulge while watching a feel-good movie.


Show yourself that you are worthy of your own love and self-care by enjoying yourself and enjoying life.


Say No in order to say yes

Very often we do things out of a habit or a wrong sense of duty. Find out what those things are in your life and stop doing them, start saying No.


Now, make a list how you can bring more joy, fun, and good feelings into your life in the future. Do you want to learn to make pottery, to dance, to paint with acrylic paints? You always wanted to do skydiving, learn horseback riding, sing in a choir?

Find out what it is that you want to say Yes to and start doing so. 


Write yourself a love letter

Put on your favourite music, pour yourself a drink, make yourself comfortable and write yourself a love letter. Write down everything you appreciate and love about yourself. What goes well in your life? What do you like doing? 


You are going to start appreciating yourself more and increase your self-confidence and self-worth.



Snuggle up in your bed, nestle yourself in a pile of pillows and your duvet, have a drink and gather all your favourite snacks. Take your journal or just a piece of paper and a pen, and start writing down everything you are grateful for right now.


This will help you to look for the positive things in life. You will experience a restful night sleep and wake up with more energy and momentum for the day.


Have a wonderful day and be well,





inner works for you



sibylle chaudhuri

coaching | consulting | mediation


fon: +49 172 6494926




Everything provided on this website – including this blog – is for informational, educational, inspirational and/or motivational purposes only. Whether you change/do something in your life is your decision and yours only. You carry solely responsibility for your decisions and your life.


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inner works for you


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sibylle chaudhuri

inner works for you
coaching & training

Ratingen / Duesseldorf

fon +49 (0)172 649 49 26